Bad news from my mum

Yesterday, I met up my mum for dinner.. We went to one hotel to try out the food... On the journey to the hotel, my mum told me after this event, she is going for operation. I was shocked with the statement, I don't know that she is suffering from stomach problem... She said doctor advice her that the risk of doing the operation, especially worry she might not strong enough to take the anesthetic's. All this while, my mum has heart problem, diabetes, high blood pressure, knee problem...

The risk of this operation is my mum might not strong enough with the anesthetic that doctor is going to use for the operation. She might die because of that...

I can't think much when she told me the news, we were on the way to food tasting... and I'm tired, my mind couldn't really digest it...By the time we finished the food tasting, it was so late...By the time I reached home, it was 12 midnight. I bathed and jumped on the bed, can't really think much...

I had a bad dream, I still remember very well the bad dream after I woke up this morning...I dream of one of my family member passed away during the event.. I was crying in the dream, meanwhile, I tried not to show the sadness...It was horrible dream...Because of the event, we can't enough the funeral, need to hide it.. The feeling was horrible.

Then I can't stop crying after that... whole day, I can't stop my tears... I was sobbing while doing my work. My eye were red and dry, my nose were red, I can't really focus on my work...I'm scare, I don't want it to happen on me, I can't lose my mum...I'm worry about my mum...I worry my mum can't celebrate the event with me...

I need my mum, I have many things to do with her, I haven't have chance to bring her for oversea vacation, I haven't finished share all my stories, I yet learn all the delicious cooking from her, I wish I have the chance to cook for her... There are so many things, hundred things, thousand things I haven't done for her yet... The most important, I can't picture my life without her. While I'm writing, again I can't stop my tears from dropping...

I will continue to pray for her, her health... I hope she will take my advise to take second doctor opinion.. I will request brothers and sisters to pray for her as well....I do hope God hear my prayer and send an angle to my mum...

My mum has been scarified a lot for her family, including me... She haven't had the chance to indulgence herself, to enjoy herself, to pamper herself... I wish I can do all these for her, I want her to pamper herself, I hope she will enjoy whatever she had missed or scarified for us...

Mum, I love you..please be strong and stay for me...